Written Work

A CONCENTRATED INSPECTION OF WATERPARK’S FIFTH STUDIO ALBUM, ‘INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY’

August 3, 2023 — Leave a comment

[author disclaimer – dates could differ based on Australian time zones]

So my favourite band dropped a new album.

On April 14th, 2023, the now out-grown Houston band Waterparks – frontman Awsten Knight, guitarist Geoff Wigington, and drummer Otto Wood – released into the world their fifth studio album, ‘Intellectual Property’, (IP) on the label Fueled By Ramen.

https://www.instagram.com/p/Cn40AjSvU1U/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

This would be the actual amalgamation of the colour red into the Waterparks universe, with texturized album art ornate with a petite poison dart frog of religious guilt.

Throwing it back to January 28th, 2022, where an uncaptioned Instagram post of the word ‘ALRIGHT’ in the front man’s signature handwriting on a plain bright red background announces the return to the dizzying reality of social media and, in turn, a new Waterparks era. As with previous albums, the entire musical chairs process of album curation to distribution is more qualifiable as the Waterparks album experience than just the final release, and this would be the start of something new.

Now, over 12 months later and the era has reached its fully-fleshed release date, with a total of 11 songs placed into the intellectual minds of the public. Myself, a die-hard Waterparks fan, included.

I’ve written pieces on this band before. In fact, I have even ranked every album, although none of that even continues to stand up to a time when I can never agree with a previous version of myself’s ranking. Alas, a lot of things I will say here will not be the first time I, or anyone, has said them.

THE ROLL OUT

As much as I love having a full album in its entire artistry in my hands, the just as articulate and detailed rollout of the project is perhaps even more exciting to me. I am a nerd about art, and my belief in it as a whole, and curating every aspect to be something within itself. Which is exactly what Waterparks does.

Especially, when building an atmosphere. “Greatest Hits was an indoor nigh time album, Intellectual Property is an outdoor day time album” The band has reached a point where laying it out to you, aspect by aspect, colour to colour, and environment is expected, and in my opinion, needed. Drip feeding the audience details that are often not even thought of by artists. Waterparks aren’t just the music, it’s the experience, and that’s the way I’ve been describing them to others for years. None of these songs would be just as impactful without that technicoloured tonal emphasis wrapped around them like cellophane. 

April 8th, 2022 we got the first single title, ‘FUNERAL GREY’. April 19th, an audio snippet. May 3rd, “It’s probably time to let you hear more than 3 seconds of FUNERAL GREY”.  May 5th, the single cover art and song release date. And on May 13/14th (time zones and all), we finally had the first song off the anticipated album. The entire process takes over a month, the build-up, the teasing, the excitement. Every little thing is calculated and artistic. 

WATERPARKS AREN’T JUST THE MUSIC, IT’S THE EXPERIENCE

For the next year, this similar approach was constructed across the rest of the singles – ‘SELF-SABOTAGE’, ‘FUCK ABOUT IT (ft. blackbear)’, ‘REAL SUPER DARK’, and ‘BRAINWASHED’. “See that’s why I like letting things sit and find its audience on its own”. All the while the band took on multiple different tour loads, such as opening for the legendary My Chemical Romance, and playing the unheard songs live before release. Generating this power and reputation behind each track, this shrill of animated anticipation. There is something to the experience of listening to some dingy, crackled concert audio clip on Soundcloud because it’s all you’ll have for a year. None of this is accidental, un-orchestrated, or without purpose and Waterparks know exactly what they’re doing to be heard for their art.

TRACK BY TRACK BREAKDOWN

I just want to be clear here that a lot of this is personal interpretation of course, so naturally please do not take everything I say to be factual for I am not the wonder that is Awsten Knight. However, here is a blog post that Travis M. Riddle, a close friend of the band and author wrote about the album.

STARFUCKER

It is known that the best, dare I say only, way to listen to a Waterparks album is by following a certain list of instructions. “Listen with the lights off, unless you have some wild lighting you love. No Twitter or social media just for a little. Just be in it.” 

“To me, the first listen of anything is the most special and you never get that experience back. So remember tonight: listen in the dark, listen loud, stay off socials for a little, you’ve got this. Just be in the moment.”

Now, where am I going with this? The opening line to the whole album is “like, take a breath, close your eyes and shit”. As a long-time fan that was already like a gut punch. And what a ride I was about to be taken on.

‘STARFUCKER’ is the polychromatic opener to the piece, and is an euphoric taste to the ultimate testament of ‘Intellectual Property’.

It utilises fourth wall breaking, an intricate and twinkling atmosphere, with an overall radio essence to me. This is a notable detail in regards to the LP’s closure sample being a radio interview.

‘STARFUCKER’ gives a hyper-pop promise, with drastically contrasting vocals. It has this feeling of being bold, yet not large. Almost like when you are first meeting someone and you can feel the presence they have, however, you two are still strangers and aren’t quite to that all-experiencing, knowable level.

With a multitude of lyrical parallels:

“I’m gonna move out of my loft and into a limousine so I can drive you fuckin crazy” // “My demons drive a limo, straight up to my window” [‘Fuzzy’, Greatest Hits].

“I’ll always be around, in fact” // [‘I’ll always be around’, Double Dare.]

In my notes, I jotted down the comment “ping pong sounds tickle my brain’, and there is no other way I could word that. ‘STARFUCKER’ cuts off dramatically and artistically mid-sentence to do that fourth-wall-breaking thing again. “I’m saying picture that but, like, right before things go dark.” Only to, perfectly and appropriately, thrust you right into ‘REAL SUPER DARK’.

REAL SUPER DARK

RSD was the fourth single we got in the lead-up to the album, and dives into a depth of playful inner child. All the while channelling “early Eminem that’s not like stabbing women, you know what I mean, like you need to like tap into like a kind of cartoonish energy”, to empathise the tracks caricature. Particularly with “Let me speak to your manager/oh you mean Benji? He’s fuckin busy, cause I just drove through AP on my brand new jet ski”. The comment around inner child essence here is super interesting as further down the album, Track 8 ‘RITUAL’, will have direct inner child lines.

@awstenmadeatiktokalright

IT GETS REAL SUPER DARK AROUND THE EDGE OF MY HEART #parx #rsd #fyp

♬ REAL SUPER DARK BY WATERPARKS – awstenknight

Commencing with a dark, quite alarming tone, ‘REAL SUPER DARK’ is a passive-aggressive, hyperactive track. It’s bratty, it’s rocky, and it’s boppy. There is the repeating elemental cycle of ups to downs, and whirlpool emotions sold to you via dazzling production and vocal range.

“My fans are the best, they’d love me more dead.” // “I guess at least my work is working right? I think people like me better when I’m hurt inside.” [‘Lowkey As Hell’, Greatest Hits].

Personally, here I feel so deeply that this is related to select themes off ‘Fandom’. Especially regarding fan perception, fan relationships, and virtual love. “You don’t love me the same, it’s a fuckin shame, I’ll never be enough until it’s too late.” [‘Watch What Happens Next’, Fandom]. “Do you believe in love, oh, is it because of me? Yeah, it’s up to me, am I the boy you dreamed of?” [‘Dream Boy, Fandom]. To even go back to my comment on virtual love, that is even a direct parallel to ‘Intellectual Property’s ‘A NIGHT OUT ON EARTH’. ‘Fandom’ held so much commentary about fan/artist dynamics, and each album since has displayed an impacting element from that, stalking to the hiding aspects from socials. This specific line can also heavily relate to ADHD Rejection Sensitivity Disorder (RSD), which is something Awsten even hinted at via Tiktok.

“But, baby, it’s gettin too loud.” // “Loud gets lonely.” [‘Tantrum’, Entertainment].

FUNERAL GREY

The one that kicked off it all, ‘FUNERAL GREY’ is a testament to capturing exactly what Waterparks were after with “THE ESSENTIAL WATERPARKS ALBUM, IT’S THE BEST AND IT’S MY BABY”.

Ethereal and weightless, track three of the LP shifted gears into the realm of opulent tones. This is the song that really yells outdoors to me, and I believe that is why it 1000% was the perfect first single. The layering of ‘FUNERAL GREY’ is so soft and near delicate. “It feels like the woo in the chorus.” [me, from my notes app].

“And now I’m trippin off the deep end.” // “I’ve been living dark in the back of the deep end.” [‘Snow Globe’, Greatest Hits].

“It’s 3AM, she walked in.” // “Now it’s 3AM everybody goes home alone.” [‘Snow Globe’, Greatest Hits].

“I know your dying wish is to be baptised in my spit.” Head dives into one of the largest themes of the album, religious guilt, something that appears frequently and often juxtaposed with the idea of something sexual. “…But the album itself has to do with overcoming, unlearning and growing past religious guilt. It’s something that I’ve struggled with for a long time.”

“Are you hearin me when I say you’re bleein me out with all the things you don’t say, I’m livin fuckin betrayed.”

RITUAL
BRAINWASHED

‘FUNERAL GREY’ is followed up with the fifth single, one that is arguably of my top songs off the album. This one right here! This one means a lot to me. I emotionally projected myself onto ‘BRAINWASHED’ which you are free to interpret that about me however you like.

Layered in emotional connections and association parallels: “I’m see through, need you.” // “I want you to need me like I need you, I need you to see me when I’m see through.” [‘Powerless’, Double Dare]. // “It’d be so nice to see you inside of somethin more see through.” [‘Last Heaven’, Demo Album]. // “Nice to fucking meet you, let’s get a little see through.” [‘Watch What Happens Next’, Fandom]. // “2015 was cold and I was see-through.” [‘I Felt Younger When We Met’, Fandom].

Instantly, there is a differing instrumental appearance of some guitars. Similar, to me, to ‘FUNERAL GREY’, but rather deeper. ‘BRAINWASHED’ is driving with the windows rolled down, in an Australian coastal summer track. Playful and delightful, and overall to me is seamlessly lovely.

“It’s been a week, I’m still at your house.” // “You’ve been at my crib for like the seventh day up in a row.” [‘FUCK ABOUT IT (ft. blackbear)’, Intellectual Property].

These two tracks are read as polar opposites, this concept of hyper-fixation and hyper-avoidance, commonly experienced within the mentality of nondivergent individuals, like those with ADHD. It is such a panicle example of the fuckery of emotions this entire piece of art represents, the intellectual property of it all. Everything is incredibly detailed and crafted with a level of care and preciseness that nothing is truly accidental here.

Now really I should be just slamming the entire second verse here, because Awsten Constantine Knight what in the HELL and HOW DARE YOU. But alas, I will contain myself. It’s more hyper and paced faster. It is again that up-and-around emotive course.

“It’s like my brain isn’t mine, you moved into my mind, dropped your bags, drew the blinds.” // “You moved in behind my eyes and built yourself a shrine.” [‘I Felt Younger When We Met’, Fandom].

“Oh, I don’t wanna leave, it’s freakin me out” // “It freaks me out, it freaks me out.” [‘REAL SUPER DARK’, Intellectual Property]. Which again, reads so much into the ADHD symbolism.

2 BEST FRIENDS

An exaggerated tonal shift that is swift and quick, much like any conceptualised emotive content expressed across the album. ‘2 BEST FRIENDS’ even links directly back up to the previous track with the line “yeah, with the blinds drawn and the lights off.” // “Dropped your bags, drew the blinds.” [‘BRAINWASHED’, Intellectual Property].

The song features a fast-paced and energetic, cartoon sound. It is, in part, separate from the other dynamics built across the album, to portray this simplistic, mantra of sorts. However, the fact and the way it does just that is quite dynamic within itself, which goes to highlight the artistry and purpose ‘Intellectual Property’ displays.

“The key to the process he says was “simplifying at the start to force you to build a more solid foundation” and that is particularly apparent on the song ‘2 Best Friends’, a fun and innocent singalong…”

“You hit back with the syntax.” // “I’ll paint you pretty with my syntax.” [‘Never Bloom Again’, Fandom].

END OF THE WATER (FEEL)

‘END OF THE WATER (FEEL)’ is interesting to me because of the dual perception in production to drive home this theme and intent of emotive juxtaposition that we see largely displayed in tracks previously such as ‘BRAINWASHED’. This is extra special to me as the title has FEEL in brackets, which I’m going to express this idea of emotive content, repress-ment, and disassociation that’s present across IP.

What struck me the most when first listening to this record and this track specifically was not just vocal range but vocal intent. Directly beforehand with ‘2 BEST FREINDS’, we are listening to a jingle of sorts, it’s juvenile (that’s not a bad thing), and it is funny and quirky in tone. The production here instantly is elevated, more grown, something that was purposefully stripped back in 2BF and purposefully presented here to curate separate and intimate points of that intent. ‘END OF THE WATER (FEEL)’ explores pretty layers and delicate high notes to start, before clicking off and saying “wait”. To start with we are presented with something so romantic in tone, illustrated with lyrical explorations of “If you feel it, then I can feel it too, if you need me, all I need is you,” before literally being told to wait and bouncing into this theme of dis-attachment, harder vocals, and speedy deliveries of “We ghost each other for a week at a time? Both waiting for each other to reply.” I have mentioned it before, and I’ll say it again, this fuckery of emotions, dopamine highs and lows is everywhere on this record.

“If you feel it, then I feel it too.” // “Do you feel it too?” [‘Telephone’, Fandom].

“Make plans and let em fall through.” // “Make plans and break them to see what you say.” [‘SELF-SABOTAGE’, Intellectual Property].

Knight is many things, and a lot of that is intentional, calculated, and by all brilliant means artistic. This track strikes me as an essential point of the album, I don’t think IP would be what it is without it, it is an integral aspect of the artistry here.

“And the distance keeps us safe, but nobody told me that safe is so lonely.” // “But I’ll just stay alone because alone is safer than being with you.” [‘High Definition’, Fandom].

And yeah, there’s a Kurtis Connor feature! ( KURTIS IS HERE? KURTIS! )

SELF-SABOTAGE

This was an early single that really indoctrinated how important and attached I would be to this album. There are a million reasons, concepts, and personal justifications for that. But for now, ‘SELF-SABOTAGE’ was the song that made me scream and cry and, funnily enough, hyper-fixate.

‘SELF-SABOTAGE’ is bold, brightly lit, and introspective. Diving through layers and high notes, packaging up a perfect recipe for a sparky, epic cinematic, and dynamic melody. Rich in taste and brilliance, track seven illustrates the uncomfortable realities and inner struggles of connection. The absolute dramatic sense of it all.

“It’s avoidable, I’ll destroy chances to be better than I was before you and me now we’re at the part where you’ll hate what you see, what the fuck is wrong with me?”

“The syndrome feels Stockholm, I’m like, do you wanna keep me on lock though?”

BRAINWASHED
RITUAL

I had this feeling ‘RITUAL’ was going to be one of the songs I would be obsessed with when the complete album was dropped, and you know what? It is. I partly had this feeling because of the reviews and commentaries about how ‘RITUAL’ was a darker element, which is something I eat up.

“My inner child needs a bullet proof vest.” // “It’s like a whole like like bombastic Larger than Life Crazy Character version of you, you know what I mean, so what do you turn on to get there? Inner child, you know what I mean, like what is your inner child…” [Awsten Knight, about REAL SUPER DARK].

Sampling a high school Sex Education video, ‘RITUAL’ blows up in your face with something that has only been sprinkled within previous tracks if you know where to look: Religious Guilt. Instantly this song is darker, it’s grained in-depth and exposition which stands apart, but not at all excluded from the entire project. Sound-wise this song is so insane that I don’t feel qualified to even talk about it in the right way. You almost think ‘RITUAL’ is bass-forward, but rather it’s almost as if it is a step or two down a ladder.

“And a phone that can’t text.” // “I wish I was dead sometimes so I wouldn’t have to check my phone.” [‘Just Kidding’, Greatest Hits].

“Never knowin what’s next, next.” // “Watch what happens next, yeah yeah.” [‘Watch What Happens Next’, Fandom].

FUCK ABOUT IT

Synth Girlie Pop Summer Day Anthem ft. Blackbear. That is what ‘FUCK ABOUT IT’ exudes to me. While this track was a single release, it was as if hearing it for the first time again when listening through the record, because ‘FUCK ABOUT IT’ stands on its own for sure, but paired with the mass amount of contextual importance ‘Intellectual Property’ displays, this track breathes an entirely new light and reality.

As well as the way this track feels like a prequel to ‘Fandom’s ‘Turbulent’, they’re defiantly cousin songs to me. This is significant when placed with this idea that ‘FUCK ABOUT IT’ and ‘BRAINWASHED’ are inter-twined opposite, sister songs. It’s like the MCU of Waterparks and their art, you’ve gotta be obsessed enough and willing to put the time in for everything to synch up through hidden Easter eggs and minuscule, perfectly timed references.

“I hate the aftertaste” // “Yeah, I kissed a couple people, but they taste wrong.” [‘2 BEST FRIENDS’, Intellectual Property].

“But it’s kinda hard to miss who’s never gone.” // “It’s like, who wants to be close with someone who always goes away?” [‘High Definition’, Fandom].

CLOSER

Once upon a time, in a Zack Zang interview as I like to quote so much, Knight mentioned the fact that IP could have ended with ‘CLOSER’, and I understand him.

“Awsten: It feels like the first two songs are both intro tracks and the last two songs are both outro tracks…when I hear the end of, um, of CLOSER I’m like that could be the end of the album. When that ends I’m like – because I’m like a big nerd about track order you know I’m kind of like a purist in that way about albums –

Zack: So you want us to listen to the whole thing in order?

Awsten: Please…But no like the album could end with CLOSER . It’s – and then to me like a night out on Earth feels like this like massive Encore track.”

Awsten Knight | Waterparks, Intellectual Property, Otto, My Chemical Romance, 2023, Zack Zang Show

If ‘CLOSER’ had been the final song on the record I would have been satisfied, I would have been emotionally distraught even. I mean, the production on this, and the way it raw’s down to end, is just so, that’s an almost perfect ending. I really needed Awsten breathlessly singing close to tears in my ears in that minimal tone.

“I got my space, but what did I pay for you?” // “I like you but I need some space.” [‘FUCK ABOUT IT (ft. blackbear)’, Intellectual Property].

‘CLOSER’ is a type of track we haven’t really seen since ‘Fandom’. Greatest Hit’s was an album of experimental progression and a deeper theatrical narrative to be told, which we can see the distinct development translated here. However, the previous record did little to nothing with bare-bones, acoustic songs, and thus ‘CLOSER’ becomes this sense of sentimental nostalgia that particularly pulls from earlier moments. This wasn’t done without recognition of that fact either. “People who get more nostalgic for my older kind of writing – maybe ‘Entertainment’-era. Not even older, just leaning on the more metaphorical, poetic side, I think that starting at the bridge of ‘Closer’, they are just gonna be fucking devastated.” 

“Cause you’re the holiday I celebrate too late.” // “Happy birthday, Merry Christmas, to the one I call my missus.” [‘Lucky People’, Entertainment]. And, to quote my notes from when I listened to this song, “THERES A LUCKY PEOPLE PARALLE ARE YOU KIDDING ME IM IN SHOCK DEADASS AND HE SAID ENTERTAINMENT ERA FUCK YOU.” I’m not normal about this track.

“You’re the song that I loved but then overplayed.” // “I wanna live inside your mind next to your favourite songs.” [‘Take Her To The Moon’, Double Dare].

“I’m the B-side throwaway.” // “You’re a symphony, I’m just a sour note.” [‘Stupid For You’, Double Dare].

“I’ve been fucked so much that I no longer wait, I sabotage and break my own heart.” // [‘SELF-SABOTAGE’, Intellectual Property].

“I love you, or I want to.” // “I really like love. Or I think I really like love.” [‘You’d Be Paranoid Too If Everybody Was Out To Get You’, book by Awsten Knight, page 191].

Now, why I say almost perfect ending, that’s because I believe the way this LP concludes is the utter best way it could have.

A NIGHT OUT ON EARTH

“Now if I ever feel jealous (what), I just turn it into lyrics and I fuckin sell it.” // [‘Teenage Jealousy’, Demo Album].

Here we are, the final piece. Every single detail, aspect, and artistic foundation I’ve mentioned above in relation to sound, production, mixing, and throwing it into something that’s fundamentally an epilogue to this entire project is the definition of euphoria. I have repeated myself endlessly when I say parx creates tones that are so pretty and delicate, that they have this ability to balance something so sparkly and elegant with strong contrasting beats. The pitch here is faultless to me. This is the essential Waterparks album and this song fuses that together. The guitars 3/4 into it, the vocal distortion on “I ain’t jumping out the window”, to the references that allude to it – all of it is seamlessly perfect.

“Now I bleed lemonade.” // “I wanna drink your blood like it’s lemonade, lemonade.” [‘Lemonade’, Demo Album].

Much of this track references the past, and the previous tracks and almost ties them up. Which is a fun thing to think about when the previous LP, ‘Greatest Hits’, ends with the song ‘See You In In The Future’. “Desensitised, the love I get it’s virtual,” references and reinstates so much, especially even part of the concept of ‘Fandom’. And this makes sense when given the context that this song is so multi-faceted. “This song is kind of like, it’s almost like all of those. It’s like a Greatest Hits sort of thing or like a collection of, you know, a bunch of songs that people never got, put into one.”

“I ain’t jumpin out the window.” // “I might just lose my shit off of the balcony, room 103.” [‘You’d Be Paranoid Too (If Everybody Was Out To Get You)’, Greatest Hits]. This here specifically pairs with the ‘We Need To Talk’ music video, where Knight jumps off the balcony and kills himself, while also linking to the number 103 which is a recurring element across different types of media and social platforms.

‘A NIGHT OUT ON EARTH’ closes the track and thus the overall project with a reflective and evocative sample of an early Waterparks interview. This audio extract is dated back to a radio appearance with Mike Fish in 2015. It is once again pulling on this sentimental aspect of things, especially for those who have been around for a while, or, as Knight mentions, are nostalgic for earlier times. For myself, I cried, and then the track looped back around to ‘STARFUCKER’. Whirlpool of emotions, I keep saying it, but that’s what this project is, and that’s what it enforces you to feel.

“Once again, this is Waterparks.”

A NIGHT OUT ON EARTH

much more than an album

‘Intellectual Property’ is an insanely brilliant piece of art, an amalgamation of all the outstanding bits and pieces that Waterparks has offered you in the past, packaged meticulously in a total of 31 minutes and 4 seconds. This is the essential Waterparks album. 

As I said earlier, “my favourite band dropped a new album”, which does of course mean I am a bit biased here. I have never not loved a parx LP. I would promote them so much at my high school. Recently, while talking to one of my best friends that I’ve known since eighth grade, he mentioned how he remembered me talking about “the hospital watermelon parking lot” and the “fanfic podcast” when those things happened. Being a Waterparks fan was my largest hyperfixation in high school, and I’m mentioning this to say while I’m about to say that ‘Intellectual Property’ is a masterpiece, I am highly chauvinistic.

I love art, I love to analyse something, and I love things that are not surface-level pretty. ‘Intellectual Property’ does all of this and more. I thought ‘Greatest Hits’ was insane, the more I returned the more I learnt, and for some reason, I didn’t think they could beat what that album did.

Elevation is the word that comes to mind here. Transcend. Amplification. Throughout the past four albums, Waterparks have learnt and developed the perfect intrinsic resolution of curating art.

Every single era, as they are often referred to, is fashioned within a window of repeating concepts. Such as the dedication to colour, theme, and even the alphabetic nature of their project titles. That in no way means Waterparks is confined to their own rules or goes without ‘breaking’ them, as was purposely reminded here following ‘Greatest Hits’. Technically, IP should have been H, since the EP ‘Airplane Conversations’ wasn’t followed up with the letter D. Instead, the next EP released was ‘Black Light’, and after that, it was not M, but the letter C for ‘Cluster’.

“I knew I wanted it to be red because the subject matter is so aggressive and in your face, very passionate, hyper-sexual, violent at points, lyrically I mean.”

Collectively, this is a project about religious trauma, mental constraints and the un-comfortability within one’s self and others. There is this element that I found interesting and wanted to share. It’s not unknown that Knight’s religious expression turned towards more Universe and Spiritual esc nature:

“Zack: When did you stop praying?

Awsten: Oh, Mom if you’re watching this turn it off. Um, no, um I don’t know. Like I think it just kind of shifted more, so, to like the universe or something…you know what I mean like some like Law of Attraction type stuff.”

Awsten Knight | Waterparks, Intellectual Property, Otto, My Chemical Romance, 2023, Zack Zang Show

There are many different facets and layers to this, of course, and throughout little things like psychics, and paranormal exploration and interest that Knight has shared before. This is an interesting detail because the opening to IP ‘STARFUCKER’, shares lyrics such as: “Jesus Christ won’t text me back” to “It’s nice to meet you (What you give out’s what you get back) / (That’s the law of attract—). Which by itself is still a cool little detail on an album so crafted around religious guilt and the relationship with that. However, what makes this even more of a possibly (more than likely) intentional choice is the fact the closing track ‘A NIGHT OUT ON EARTH’ replicates, and thus, instils this point. “Now Jesus hates my guts, it’s gettin’ personal (Yeah)” to “Born January 17th, I’m overthinkin’ everything a Capricorn with double horns like triple six…”

You can look at this through the lens of furthering that disconnect with God, especially given the context that the symbol of Capricorn is a goat which is through many different religious looks tied to the Devil, paired with the mentioning of horns and triple six. Although, to deepen this, is simply by mentioning astrology in general. This isn’t to say that Awsten per se would be/is into that, I’m not making claims on his behalf. But what it is is a part of the same realm of this law of attraction, the manifestation ideas. Add that both ‘STARFUCKER’ and ‘A NIGHT OUT ON EARTH’ on different ends of the album do this structure is really just tying these little pieces together.

Knight can’t help but accept that he is meant to be unapologetic. “At the end of the day, I’d rather make the coolest fucking thing, rather than hold back and make something that wasn’t that good.”

ALTPRESS: How Waterparks’ wildly eclectic INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY turns into a love story, 2023

I could write for days about the multi-dimensions within this record, how represented I feel when I listen to it as another ADHD, somewhat insane creative. I probably won’t stop finding little details that add to the gripping account of the labyrinth of human emotions and desires constructed. Ultimately, though, is that not what makes good art?

“I’m dying to give you a show,” and quite literally this is what IP does. It is show-stopping, it is performance art, it is a spectacle. “Intellectual property is the mental space you give to something in your head. The ‘property’ may be the thing that you are struggling with. By materializing it and giving it its own world, it’s actually a great way to express it and then, eventually, expel it,” he explains. “I want this album to go to the fucking moon.” It is more than safe to say, with their first top ten album in the U.K, and one of the most successful pieces they’ve put out that Waterparks have more than achieved that. Because, overall, Waterparks know how to create something larger than life itself, something detailed and projecting intricate rhythmic arrangements in their world of unstructured visual and mental stimuli.

“It’s been a pleasure.”

STARFUCKER

A COLLECTION OF FAVOURABLE LIVE MUSIC EXPERIENCES

January 25, 2023 — Leave a comment

To start things off, this idea is one million percent taken from my dearest friend, Tyneesha, however, I do promise you’ll get something different out of this. Such as the amount of times I spend crying at gigs. I need to start a tally.

I have been going to live music shows since I was 12-13-ish, and while so many I would never even imagine piling into this post, and so many that I’m ashamed to have even seen such terrible people, sprinkled in between those and the allegations are some of the most euphoric moments of individual existence. That paired with a daunting opinionated personality right down to the venue, the time of year – I’m looking at you The Big Top in the middle of Australian Summer, hand me that free water – and crowd, I have complied this list of moments I deem favourable.

MOTIONLESS IN WHITE

In 2017, Motionless In White released their Graveyard Shift album in May and followed that up with an Australian tour in the Summer. I had more than one show to go to within a three-day period at this time, and considering the fact I was a minor and lived rurally, I went all out for this show. I had this mental list of songs I needed to hear, was on my knees begging, and outstandingly all but two were met in those hours. Plus I was attending this gig with some of my best friends, as well as being the start of shows my parents were allowing me to attend without an adult present. Crown The Empire opened for this show, which was a comedic additive to the night. I brought one of my favourite pieces of merch that night, and it’s still holding up with only slight fading in 2023! Afterwards, I ate the most terrible Hungry Jacks meal and have never eaten there again since, which really pushes this memory up.

TROPHY EYES

I am not going in any sort of order here, but this gig was after the first wave of Covid-19 lockdowns, and it was going to be my first entry back into shows, and at my University too, so I was over the moon. Plus this tour was more than just an average “let’s play some songs” gig, with the band rightfully naming this tour ‘We Need To Talk’ where it was more about connecting, telling stories, and singing. As a die-hard Trophy Eyes fan this was a beautiful experience, something I haven’t ever experienced again and probably won’t. Coincidentally, I went to this show with the same friends as the one above. I was fairly drunk, but so was the band by the end of it. It was like hanging out with friends who happen to also be singing some tunes you cried to last week. To me, there really is something about being in a crowded room full of American Trad tattoos, old-school Vans, and beer that makes me think pure happiness is achievable. I think I even cried during this show. I also nearly had to sleep at the train station that night after the drivers went on strike, which certainly was eventful.

HELLIONS

That second gig I had the same week as Motionless In White I mentioned? Well, Hellions opened, and there is something to be said about an opener who can really play to a crowd that quite literally is not there for them. To be fair I wasn’t there for the main band either since I was only there for a friend as a buddy. Hellions have had a little place in my heart of Aussie bands for years, and I can pinpoint this show as the reason they stuck with me. I love energy, I love movement, and nothing apart of their set was a dull moment. I really hate the venue that this took place in like it is pure hatred, and the fact this whole experience has made it onto this list despite that? Incredible. There is also something to be said about an artist who can really play in a terrible spot, too.

THE STORY SO FAR

Now, this list isn’t in any numbered first-to-last order or anything, but if it were this would be a contender for that top shot. This set was only a month ago during a festival, a festival I realistically only attended for them. My bank account cried a bit, but every broke Uni student penny counted for this moment was life-changing. For context, I had desired to attend their previous Aus tour, however, was unable to due to unfortunate events and I sobbed into my partner at the time’s arms about the Instagram stories on my feed. So when I fought through two, possibly three I can’t remember, different sets of bands to get a centre barricade spot just for them I was either achieving that or dying. I have never been as happy as I was during their set. This was a top moment of my lifetime. I did miss a crowd surfer coming towards me during ‘Keep This Up’ – my fault! 100% on me! – and have a large man slam my head into the barricade bar and sit on me. Security couldn’t even get him off me for ages, and when he finally rolled off, nearly taking me over with him, everyone was insisting I go to the medical tent. Did I? No, I paid hundreds of dollars to be here I wasn’t leaving. It did result in a concussion, and a massive right side of the face bruise for a week but I meant it when I said you would have to drag me out dead to get me to leave. One of the most memorable parts of this was the fact I stood there for 20 minutes afterwards and cried. The crowd had left to go see Deftones and later Bring Me The Horizon, but I was a mess. My friend had to come to collect me. This was one of the happiest moments of my entire life, I screamed every song, I threw myself into it all and wouldn’t change it.

THORNHILL

During the same festival as above, the only other real dire need was to see Thornhill in the morning. I love them so much. I cannot even put in words how much. There is just something about them and their music that shifts me somewhere else. My friend hadn’t heard their stuff before and afterwards, mentioned how good they were, and how they should be listening to them. I managed to hackle my way of getting a setlist too! Cue it being one of my most prized possessions now. The crowd was so fun here, especially since they were one of the first bands on the line-up to play stage four. We were all fresh-faced, a couple of vodka Redbull’s in, full of buzzing electricity. Which, to be fair, is the way I would describe not only their performances, but also their style. It was so hot during their set, I was basically melting, but alas nothing was stopping me and I was moshing around, letting loose, and yelling to some of my favourite songs.

WAAX

During another favourite live music event that will be mentioned soon, Waax was an opener. There is something special about only a handful of people in the front end of a crowd that knows a band. I was so hyped when a lot of people were so dead. I was singing, I was moving, and I was the centre barricade for this event by chance too. Maz – the love of my life – was so interactive during this show. There was this moment down from the stage where she held my hand and sang to me. I was losing my mind. The number of times I got to be sung at considering how dead the rest of the crowd was from their lack of knowledge was butterfly-inducing. I mentioned it above about how there is something to be said about openers who can really play to a crowd that mostly is not there for them. I’ve seen many that get a bit overwhelmed, which is completely valid and understandable. You don’t start being confident you grow into it. That being said, when you see a band that just takes an opening spot by storm its incredibly rememberable, just like Waax here. At the end of the show, their lovely drummer handed me a setlist. I was yelling, and I still had so much more of this night to go…

THE AMITY AFFLICTION

…Such as The Amity Affliction. I wrote a whole piece on this gig here, after waiting for rescheduling and Covid restrictions for it. I had met them a few years prior too. I even got to see them again a few months later at Good Things Festival 2022, which was the same setlist besides their latest release, and not as fun since I went down in the mosh and feared for my life. But this night? Already off to an outstanding start as mentioned. This was my first gig with fire effects, which was fabulous, I loved that detail. The thing with Amity shows, and a lot of metal is that it’s basically a push-and-no-shove game. The objective is to crush each other, to be suffocated, and it doesn’t sound nice but it’s the most fun. The important part of it is how the crowd is with taking care of each other, and every time I have seen Amity, whether I survived or tumbled down, I am taken cared of. The setlist was nicely packed with different eras, people standing on the crowd, nudity, and a community. I ate the most diabolical Macca’s meal before a train and Uber home while in complete and utter dissociation.

BRING ME THE HORIZON

This is one of my favourite moments in live music because of how different it was from most. Again, it was at a festival, but it was a set I witnessed will no stress, far away from the stage in a field of complete strangers who banded together to sit, stand, and softly sing at sunset. Compared to the high-demand pit, or any close vantage point to see Bring Me The Horizon headline a festival in Australia that was vicious, potent and loud, the far back was full of quiet, tired, and totally euphoric individuals. I tend to be a pit person unless I’m super into an artist and head for that barricade spot because I love being hyper, intense, and rowdy. That’s my thing, and this was so unlike that, and myself, that it booted this experience towards the top. Not to mention, as many people have brought up, this festival had some sound issues. Which I’m not here to complain about it, these things can happen, but strangely enough, it somehow made parts of this set better. What I mean by that is it’s Bring Me The Horizon, everyone knows their songs, so in those moments of sound difficulties, all that surrounded us was the voices of hundreds of people who didn’t need anything to keep them in time, tune, or place. It’s that kind of thing you think about as a pre-teen emo, where lyrics mean more to you than your English paper, and standing with the like-minded belting your heart out to ‘Can You Feel My Heart’ and ‘Drown’ is a dream. It was a dream. Plus, it is so contradictory to say I had a soft and gentle time seeing this band, the band known and loved for a divine aggression. 

To conclude, there have been many shows, gigs, and events I have been to in the near ten years – I can’t believe I just typed that? It’s ageing me – of live music that has a place in my heart that isn’t on this list. Because, as much as an artist can mean to you at the time, no one in the emo-alternative sphere has been safe from said artists. I hate knowing I’ve spent money, and met certain people, who have abused their positions of power to take advantage of minors, and fans. I want to note it though, I think it’s important, and I want to make it clear that a lot of these are more recent sets because of this. It sucks, it’s hurtful, and I’m exhausted of it to be fair.

Besides that downward turn there, there will always be live music in my life, so I am sure this list will probably be outdated in a year or two. Which I think is part of the joy of it. Music is ever-changing, gigs are too, and so am I. One day I might look back on any of these and think “yeah, it happened”, instead of “yeah, that happened!”. We’ll see, I’m sure I’ll let you know.

As Always, Love,

TUMBLR IS MAKING A RETURN BUT SO IS MY OBSESSION WITH MATTY HEALY

October 20, 2022 — Leave a comment

If you have been living under a rock by any chance lately than you wouldn’t know that the Tumblr darlings The 1975 just released their 6th studio album titled “Being Funny In A Foreign Language”. Though, if you’ve been online at any point within the last week then of course you know this since, once again, some British boys have broken it.

There has been this ongoing trend within media since the decade switch from the 2010’s; as contradictory as it sounds, it is as if we’re in this constant state of reminiscence, desire, and an oddly placed “thank fuck that’s over”. Really, I think a lot of this comes from the longing for Tumblr, while also despising it. It’s weird too, having been a teenager in the 2010’s, to see it so romanticised while also the current teens wishing they were apart of it. I mean, that’s how I felt with Myspace having only been around that time because of an elder sibling. Tumblr has become what Myspace was in the 2010’s – loathed, criticised (rightfully), but nonetheless yearned for.

And that is kind of exactly what this new The 1975 album sounds like if I were to personify it.

WAKE UP BABE WE GOT ROBBERS 2!

I don’t think my feed has been this full of the band since Tumblr, I mean I have friends from high school sending me tiktoks about this whole resurgence that I hardly speak to. Not to mention that the aesthetic we all associate with that era is on the return. If I’m going to be honest, I still dress like some awkward emo, grunge Tumblr kid so I’m happy it’s back in. Leave my messy eyes, Dr. Martins, and torn stockings alone, she’s trendy again.

“You’re makin an aesthetic out of not doing well” – The 1975 (BFIAFL)

I don’t really know how to talk about this album. I took no notes. I listened to it while I cried in my bedroom at night. How else was I supposed to? What I do know is that Matty Healy just be saying words and oh, oh how I love that he does.

One of my favourite things about this album is that while I will sit here and say its a call back to the 2010’s, I wholeheartedly believe it is an elevated, somewhat more grown in time, and just older. Not, in the way you would mean that this is better, for that is subjective, but as if those albums were kids, and this is them as a raging 20 something. That could just be my perception since I was so young and now I am a raging 20 something. Either way, that’s what I think, and its really something to ponder. 

SCENE ONE, ACT ONE 

A teenage Taylorlani is sitting on their bed, a stolen pack of her parent's cigarettes beside her. She is the embodiment of a mess - hair, makeup, and flannel plaid clothes. Off her tiny phone speaker plays THE 1975 album 'I LIKE IT WHEN YOU SLEEP, FOR YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL YET SO UNAWARE OF IT'. She is crying and drained. A typical teenage girl. 

END SCENE 

SCENE TWO, ACT ONE

A 20 something Taylorlani is sitting on their bed, a brought with her own money pack of cigarettes beside her. She is the depiction of a put together mess - hair, makeup, and stockings with a rip at the knee. Off her laptop speaker plays THE 1975 album 'BEING FUNNY IN A FOREIGN LANUAGE'. She is exhausted, crying in a free moment. Your standard University girl. 

END SCENE

Okay, so maybe it might just be because I’m older. I still feel it. I feel it man, that’s what this album has been doing to me. I keep seeing those “this has changed the trajectory of my life path” tiktoks about Track 10 ‘About You’, and yeah. Just yeah. Its as if I have awoken from some dehydrated fever dream of a reality and placed back where I was supposed to be. Where teenage me thought I would be. So much of my thought process sometimes is if teenage Taylorlani would think I was cool, and with this whole resurgence I think she most certainty would think that.

Bouncing off that it’s almost as if this album, this Matty Healy is on my social media feed across all platforms (have you seen the Chicken Shop Date with Amelia Dimoldenberg? Ugh) has healed some form of my inner child. It’s grounding almost. Which you might be thinking “calm down it’s just an album, man”, and you’re right it is. An outstanding beauty that is pure freaking artistry. It is so good that I truly feel as if I have changed. Sonically brilliant as always. Tonally enticing, makes me think of spearmint.

All in all, I am here for whatever this era is. Whether Tumblr comes back head first, or it’s just the stylistic nature that was that time. I am so incredibly excited to see what other art comes from this, and who better to really slam us back in time than The 1975?

EQUIPPED WITH MUSIC I’VE BEEN LOVING THIS YEAR AND SUNGLASSES

July 30, 2022 — Leave a comment

Hey, hey! 

It’s the end of July, it’s basically Halloween to me, which also means we’re a very decent amount into the year. Crazy right? This year has weirdly blown by me like a passing breath. One moment it was January and I was changing into a different University major years into my degree, and now I’m here with an abundant list of music I’ve been listening to all year. 

HALESTORM’S BACK FROM THE DEAD [ THE ALBUM] 

I actually wrote down my first thoughts to each song when this album dropped with the intent of a review, however the days and months went on and I was still too burnt out, too tired, and too sad to write a thing. Yet, in saying that, I listened to this album constantly during that time. See, Back From The Dead is aggressively feminine with a soccer punch of personal growth, age, and worth. It is quite literally everything I wanted and definitely needed. Enriched with kickass women-hood and acceptance of self delivered in a metal music love letter. The album just straight bangs. I mean, I’ve only heard the term “bombshell” in regards to women from the mouth of a man with eyes of sexualation. While I wouldn’t say reclaimed is the right word here, I want to still make a point of it. I think that’s kinda something important to unpack, as well as being a testament to what this whole project is doing. 

Notable favourite song recommendations from said album: Wicked Ways, Strange Girl, My Redemption, and Psycho Crazy. 

POPROPICASLUTZ! 

This might get kind of “fangirl” of me, but really that’s a good sign. I have not gone a single day since January of this year where I have not listened to these guys. That’s not even an exaggeration, my Spotify “On Repeat” is cursed now. January 2022 met us with that iconic release of WW3, and I have been basically drugged musically since. I am an addict. I want my Poptropicaslutz fix all the time. I don’t even know how to describe this stuff to you, me who writes poetry, is at a near constant loss for words. My only attempt would be if you take the Neon Pop Punk era, Myspace Scene sound of I Set My Friends On Fire/Brockencyde, 2010’s emo rap (though not necessarily “Sad Boi”), and throw it in something more intense than a blender. I don’t know how it works. I don’t know why it does. I do not know anything other than everything – and by God do I mean everything – is straight heat. I literally be giggling and kicking my legs when they randomly tweet out “new song tonight”. 

Notable favourite song recommendations: romeo & juliet, I MISS 2007, user not found, eccentric hats & motley patterns, and Hysteria is impossible without an audience. 

HOT MULLIGAN 

Do not bother making “this is a red flag” comment. Do not bother asking “are you okay?” because I do not have an answer for you. What I do have is Spotify history of the year where Hot Mulligan is very, very present, and truthfully I’m not mad about it. Well, they’re pro Milk, so maybe a little mad about it. God I hope someone gets that joke, otherwise I’m gonna look so stupid. Back to the point, I have been religiously listening to Hot Mulligan all year. I mean I will always love and be emotionally attached to this beautifully mastered genre of Pop Punk. They’re one of the few I think is making the 2010’s styles translate magically well into that of current. I also just think they’re funny. They make me laugh and feel warm and poetically sad. Of course I’ve been listening to them so much. 

Notable favourite song recommendations: Feal Like Crab, Drink Milk and Run, Featuring Mark Hoppus, and Dary. 

SCARLXRD 

This is a little switch up to the previous two, but if you know me I am always listening to Scarlxrd. I tend to keep my playlists pretty organised, yet he is there in pretty much all of them. Scarlxrd is perfect for any mood at any time. Sad? Scarlxrd. Angery? Scarlxrd. Feeling your inner God complex? Scarlxrd. His discography is fairly large, so if you’re into this intense, trap, metal, rap, aggressive bass, there is bound to be something you vibe with. I love him. I love his music. He’s up there incredibly high on my top artists of all time and has been for ages. 

Notable favourite song recommendations: {Flex’}, Rxbxt Slut!, I WANT TX SEE YXU BLEED, Bible Black, and Gin Shxt. 

MAGNOLIA PARK 

This is not the first time I’m talking about them and it sure as hell will not be the last. I think around this time last year I wrote this piece about artists you should be paying attention to in the scene with them as the forefront. So I guess I’m incredibly happy to say not only are they still some of my top played artists but also their incredible growth. I’m kind of emotional about it. Proud don’t begin to cover it. Mag Park have put out numerous tracks since then, and I’ve loved every single one. They are the epitome of what Pop Punk is in this modern wave, and everything that we needed to further progress. Constantly challenging the privileged white attitude/opinions (you know the ones ugh) that has always been plaguing the scene and doing it with some of the best music I’ve heard in forever. There really isn’t a question as to why I’m always listening to them. They’re too cool, too vibrant, too outstanding to not be. 

Notable favourite song recommendations: Don’t Be Racist, Outside, Kids Like Us, Liar, Serious, and Back Home. 

AISLINN DAVIS 

Again, a little bit of a switch up here, but if there is anything to know about me is that my music taste is truly everything in existence pretty much. With that being said, I, like many others, became obsessed with Aislinn’s music via TikTok, and really it’s been living rent free around my head for a while. Her voice is truly prettier than heaven knowns and I could honestly listen to her sing about anything. I can’t really explain what her music makes me feel but I know it’s something I want to never stop feeling. I don’t know guys, but there’s something about the gentle sea-breeze of my town, soft setting sun, open windows, and her music that makes me believe I am living the best human experience available. 

Notable favourite song recommendations:  poltergeist, Devil Boy, think about u, death wish, and Gwen. 

HONOURABLE SONG MENTIONS

  • Dove Beach – Baby Queen
  • SELF-SABOTAGE – Waterparks 
  • Chaos Castle – Xavier Wulf 
  • Just Sign the Papers – Aaron West and The Roaring Twenties 
  • Blender – 5 Seconds of Summer
  • Clearest Blue – CHVRCHES
  • What I Would Give – Angelmaker 
  • Kiss – Lil Peep
  • Loser – Sueco
  • Two Week Notice – Leanna Firestone
  • life’s such a trip – Softheart 

Soak Me In Bleach (Or Well Alcohol Actually)

July 25, 2022 — Leave a comment

Hey, hey! 

As promised, a music related blog post, one that I have been trying to bring to you for over a year. In early 2021 or late 2020, I purchased tickets to go see some live music — however, as we’re very aware here in Australia, it’s only been the last maybe four to six months where live shows have been back in action and that gig was postponed not once, but twice. Now, there’s no ill will here or anything, I feel for the impacts the pandemic and lockdowns had on the music scene, but if anything it made the arrival of the set date more exciting. 

Usually I wait a couple of months or just under a year for the dates of shows to roll around. That’s for the bigger ones, not the local joints I like to hit up when I can. Maybe I should write something about those types of trips? But this time it was basically a year and half, which if I’m honest, built up enthusiasm for it and, in turn, the crowd was rowdy and insane. Put a bunch of Aussie metalheads in an 18+ alcohol filled gig for Aussie bands after that long of a wait and it makes sense the chaos that erupted. I loved every second of it, even the weird or negative parts, because now I get to tell this story to you. 

https://www.tiktok.com/@xo.taylorlani.xo/video/7121251254344436993?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc&web_id=7122724159990040066

THE ACTS

The main act, infamous The Amity Affliction, who are known for being very aquatic in tone. (No really, I can’t look at the ocean and not go “ah, like the amity songs”). They’re also known for being intense crowd wise, I’ve never heard of them not having at least one wall of death much like the multiple we had at second Sydney show, located at The Roundhouse. 

Although I initially brought tickets for the main act, I was just as excited for the openers Nerve Damage and Waax. Nerve Damage started it all off with an Acknowledgement to Country, which if you’re not Australian, is the acknowledgment for the indigenous peoples who’s land we’re on. I’m sad to say that it is the first time ever that’s ever happened at a concert, and I’ve been a frequent attendee since I was 13 years old. Their set was like the best taster for the night, loud, in your face, and overall politically charged. I am proud to say that I was centre barricade for this show, partly because I travelled out to the venue and always account for traffic issues and such, which left friends and myself there a tad early. However, it meant I had a fantastic view, and was blown away by each act. Especially by Nerve Damage.

Now, I love Waax. I’m not like a super/long term fan or anything (yet anyway) but I knew them, I liked them, and I was excited for them. My expectations? More than met, especially when the ever-so dashing vocalist grabbed my hand. Listen, I nearly shed a tear. The stage presence was lovely, and I am so happy to see women on stage. In fact I even managed to be handed – yes handed not snatched – a setlist. I’ve never managed a set list before. Guitar pics, drum sticks (I think? My memory sucks) even, yes, but never before a setlist. 

Okay, onto what you’re all here for, The Amity set. My loves, I don’t know how to tell you this, I think I just had one of the best show experiences of my life. There was fire! FUCKING FIRE! Honestly, I’m glad there was it turned up the temperature and being winter it was so cold that night. The energy was wild, like I said, all the built up time and restlessness made us all crazy. I lost my voice like three songs in, that’s how hard I was screaming. I think I nearly threw up from emotions, it was all so raw. Also there were mirrors? Fun house mirrors maybe? They lit up? I can’t recall exactly but it was cool. The setlist was top tier. Like you always have those conversations with people about songs you want an artist to play, what you hope or think would be cool to be heard, and that set was exactly that. I was a little sad when it was over. Part of me was exhausted and sore (more on that later), and the other part of me didn’t want it to end. I would pay for Amity to preform in my bedroom but they’d probably burn it down. 

THE EXPERIENCE 

I’ve told you how much I loved the acts, how good they were, but now for the fun part: the details! 

I mentioned centre barricade, which is a brilliant but cursed spot to have. It’s such a “stick it out as long as you can survive” position as you get an entire crowds worth of body weight pressing you into metal. Depending on the type of show of course, some aren’t that aggressive. There’s no shame in lasting one song or the whole act, but I’m excited to say I survived the whole thing without jumping out. Not without escaping some injuries. I am incredibly bruised and aching. One of my calves is black near the knee.

I had some brain cells to bandage up some body piercings before attending, and I’m so thankful for that sober-smart Taylorlani who did that because otherwise there would have been a hospital visit. I did lose an earring as it was jacked out and, to be fair, I don’t remember it happening which goes to show how much was happening at any given moment. It’s okay, I put a safety-pin in it for the time until I got home. God, the adrenaline. 

I did nearly have my medusa piercing torn out by a crowd surfers knee, but that’s okay because I did accidentally punch him in the groin trying to lift him up. I’m 5’2 guys, I’m the height of a 12 year old. I genuinely haven’t grown since that age. If you’re that guy, I’m so sorry, really I was trying to not get crushed. Speaking of crowd surfers though, one guy smelled like a metalhead stereotype, and another kicked me in the head. It’s okay, I’m okay, I’m sure they had the time of their lives. Especially the lad who stood on the crowd – yeah like on his legs – and then jumped directly on me. Iconic of them, I’m so weirdly happy I got that on camera too, otherwise I don’t know how to describe it. 

I was slammed into the barricade more times than I can count and believe me I know numbers, I can count to ten. Applaud me. It was so hype, it was so rewarding to be back at a live gig like that. But alas, there is always something that leans more negative on the night. 

A wonderful gal and lad were elbowing my side, my arm, my body all night really hard and more forceful than the crowd. At first I was like, c’mon you know? But during a quick break between songs they leaned over to apologise and say how they’re trying to stop this one large guy from groping me as he’d been trying all night. Now, I hate to say that this is something I’m used to but I am, and I knew someone had during Nerve Damage, but pushed it aside. I appreciate this couple so much. There’s this stereotype of how metalheads are terrible, big, and scary who will beat you up. But it’s a person thing, not a metalhead thing. Assholes aren’t dictated by genre. Yet, this is the type of attitude I do encounter a fair bit these days. This, like, protective community. Really, I’m so thankful for them, and I’m incredibly grateful that they even went out of their way to do so. 

Metal is full of this hand in hand, help each other out, mentality if you look deeper for it, and I’m proud to say I also live by it. I’m short, but there are plenty of girls who are shorter and smaller than me who attend. It’s not hard to help out when crowd surfers head directly for them. Not to say they’re weak, they’re at a crazy metal gig of course they’re not, but having a body thrown at you can be hell, and I do try my best to cover people when I can or it’s safe for me too.  

On a more higher note, there was insane pit action, there always is at Amity shows. There was multiple walls of death which even I at the barricade got the privilege to be crushed in. My friend got a guitar pic. We spent money on merch. I took a cup from the ground that was cool and sticky. I saw some limes floating in the air, on the floor. I got sprayed with beer and water, as well as spat on. I’m sorry to cleaners. 

It was the most fun I’ve had in ages. I don’t regret a single second of it. I chase the gig adrenaline more than anything in my whole life. It is pure erotica. I’ve been addicted since I was 13 and still wearing a scene mullet with fried bleached hair. I live for music, for live music, for the everything. I love writing about it, the whole thing. It’s more me than if I handed you a bone from a ribs. 

Wait for the Good Things 2022 blog post, since I am happy to announce I will be attending. God, I’m so (happily) broke. 

Movies That Left Core Memories So Bad That They’ve Replaced The Sad Ones

June 17, 2022 — Leave a comment

Hey, Hello, Hi, 

I want to simply brush over the fact that I haven’t written or posted anything since, I believe, February. There are many reasons, all of them dull and boring, but I think I’m back to possible frequent uploads. Thus, while a music piece is in the works, here is a list, in no particular order, of films that have left a lasting impact. 

I would be lying if I didn’t say this post wasn’t inspired by my lovely friend, Ty, who you should be reading from and posts way more than me too. Anyway, as they said, I’m no film degree nerd with any true stance to be able to comment like one, but alas I will. 

1. Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe 

2005, Director: Andrew Adamson

I feel like, for many of my generation, this one speaks for itself. However, while I loved fantasy films and novels like Eragon, C.S Lewis’s Chronicles of Narnia truly never left my head. Like ever. So much so that I freak out when I realise how old this movie and I are. You’re telling me it’s nearly been 20 years and I still think about this all the time? I remember as a kid I was so upset that the wolves were always displayed as evil in these films, which I still stand by fully, however that scene of them in the ice castle when Edmund betrays his family? Rent Free. 

2. Whiplash

2014, Director: Damien Chazelle

This film makes me sound like an obnoxious film guy at university who doesn’t really understand the complexities of it, but I like to believe I’m not like them. Miles Teller is a chef’s kiss, and considering the most recent release of Top Gun: Maverick, this is the perfect time to talk about the absolutely brilliant performance from him and his co-star J.K Simmons, who truly made me fear potential mentors/teachers. Now, I’ve heard people say this movie is boring, which I highly disagree with. Nonetheless, I understand it is the type of thing you need an attention span for to really grasp it.  

3. The Spectacular Now

2013, Director: James Ponsoldt

I am a Miles Teller girlie, through and through, since this movie and the Divergent adaptations. I believe I even forced my last partner to watch this movie with me, and couldn’t shut up during it. It is so much more than a silly love story, and to be fair one of my favourite aspects is the real depiction of mental health through a teenage boy. Yeah, Perks of Being a Wallflower is there and should be on this list in a way, but The Spectacular Now is so vastly different to it and just as important. Relationships don’t cure mental issues as much as we want them to. 

4. Coraline

2009, Director: Henry Selick

This is usually what I say when people ask what my favourite movie is and that still highly stands. I adore Coraline so much, and I’m the kind of friend who bullies you for a) not having seen it or b) were scared of it as a child. I never was, yes it’s a flex, and I even analysed it this past semester for a monster media class. 

5. Pride and Prejudice

2005, Director: Joe Wright

Oh, the love, the adoration, I have for this movie. It is truly just so magical, so outstandingly beautiful. The score, the cinematography, the casting – I mean Kiera Knightly was one thousand percent part of my sexual awakening. This film is a core memory, the essence, the atmosphere, all of it holds weight in my heart. 

6. The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones

2013, Director: Harald Zwart

Did I at the time hate this adaptation? Yes. Was I super hopeful for the show version but then dramatically betrayed, and even see myself as a victim of that show? Yes. Now, despite all that I still had it as a guilty pleasure film. Little Taylorlani would stay up late reading with it on in the background and would first try to dabble in realism portraiture trying to draw Jamie’s Jace. It was horrible, I was like 11. 

7. The Hunger Games

2012, Director: Gary Ross

Is there a running theme of 2000s novel adaptations on this list? Of course, I am nothing but a little book nerd. City of Bones is a guilty pleasure, but with The Hunger Games, there is not a single ounce of guilt. I could write essays upon essays about the book and the movie. I rewatch the whole series at least three times at minimum a year and own multiple copies of the books. I am convinced anyone who never liked it, or was team Gale, just never understood. 

8. The Crow

1994, Director: Alex Proyas

Ugh, this movie. I heard there might be a remake? I don’t want it and I don’t think anyone should. Brendon Lee’s depiction of Eric is unmatched, it is beautiful, and it is tragic the way his life ended from it. I was raised on this movie, my dad owns this doll-sized figurine of Eric and as a kid, I threw fits because he would not let me play with it. If you haven’t seen this at least once in your life, please do. 

9. Scream

1996, Director: Wes Craven

Okay, so this is not a surprise. This is deeply loved, and I am another one of those lovers. I arguably watched it way too young and was actually scared of Ghost Face when I was little, though that has done a complete switch up now. This movie was important to a loved one who passed away, which is a sad, but beautiful way of keeping their spirit alive. 

10. Love, Rosie

2014, Director: Christian Ditter

Lily Collins is another common feature on this list, and truly I do love her. This movie encapsulates the mundane, the normalities, and the complexities of human relationships, ageing, and love. It is rich and warm in emotion. Comfort movie, and living in my head. Oh, for that love.

11. X-Men: First Class

2011, Director: Matthew Vaughn

I am completely a comic girlie at heart, although I am not an MCU one to be fair. I don’t hate it, it’s really not that deep, I just view comic adaptations the same as book ones and a lot of them leave me disappointed. First Class though? Adore it. Yeah, Wolverine isn’t in it (besides that small cameo), but that’s kind of why I love it so much.  

12. Man of Steel

2013, Director: Zack Snyder

Again, comics, my heart, although yet again I am not really a DCEU girlie. The same reason as above, but I do read more DC comics. Man of Steel was one of the first comic films I fell in love with, outside of my Spider-man obsession. To be fair, I can’t tell you why besides the atmosphere, the depth, and the way it actually made me cry. Man of Steel set up something that sadly couldn’t be topped by the follow-ups for that era. In my opinion anyway.

13. Into the Spiderverse

2018, Directors: Peter Ramsey, Bob Persichetti, Rodney Rothman

I mentioned the Spider-man obsession, it’s intense. My father would tell you he hates Spider-man because of me, for every time I was around when I was young I would be binge-watching them. I saw Toby’s third movie in the cinema, yes it was 2007, and yes I was 5 years old. Now, as someone who is biracial, Into the Spiderverse and just Miles as a comic character, is something I am emotionally attached to. I will always feel more in tune with him than Peter, but I am typing this as I have a Peter Spider-man blanket on my bed. Yes, I am 20. 

14. The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

2012, Director: Peter Jackson

I remember when I was in year seven we had to read The Hobbit, at that time I didn’t want to, not because I hated it but because I was deep in my YA fantasy/dystopia 2010’s era and my interests laid elsewhere. Because of this, I watched the film, however, it was at that moment I fell in love with the movie and also realised that the book was being broken into different parts and had to read it for class anyway. 

15. Fantastic Mr Fox

2009, Director: Wes Anderson

Finishing off this list with an animation masterpiece, though there are plenty of more movies I can mention. I wholeheartedly cherish this movie. It’s pretty, it’s coloured like my soul, and so comforting that many of the scenes are core memories. It just makes me happy, which is something I can say for everything on this list which is ultimately the most important thing to me. 

The Grief Of February

February 18, 2022 — Leave a comment

Hey, hey!

This year I wanted to start being a little bit more personal on here, like sharing life updates and just different aspects of myself that aren’t strictly “here’s a book!” or “hey look at this band!” 

February is a month that comes around every year, and every year it pulls me under a blanket of shade and shuddering breath. When I was younger I lost an incredibly important person to me very suddenly, it shook up my life and myself to the core. February was his birthday month, and so every time the calendars flip it’s a reminder of time. 

I could talk for days about how grief and death has affected my life as I grew, how it impacts my life years down the track but I don’t really want to. I feel like I live in this loop of life that snaps like a rubber band and I never really leave it behind. 

Thus, here I am to talk about my February so far and things I do to take care of myself. That’s an important part of this whole thing is remembering you’re alive and you need care. 

FRIENDS

I try to be as social as I possibly can be – and manage – in February. I’m usually on a university break around this time just before it goes back for the year and I try my best to compact as much in person social interactions as I can in the weeks. 

It’s important when mourning to remember those around you who are still here, to not let moments slip between your fingers that you might regret if anything were to happen. I do try to not think of things “happening” to my loved ones but the paranoia is there for sure. This month I’ve traveled a lot, catching train after train to different parts of the South Coast of NSW to see friends. Later this month I’ll be travelling out of state for the first time since I was 17 and in high school to see family. 

Friends are also important in taking care of yourself because, as hard as it can be to accept, they’re there for you to lean on when you need it! Especially if they’re offering, it’s okay to need that. Some of my closest friends, Tyneesha, Alana, and Bonnie are truly the most talented and beautiful people I have ever met so I want to use this moment to shout them out.

LOVE

I was gonna title this hobbies but I know that’s clique, so instead it’s love because just do things you love. For you not for anyone else! This can be a bit difficult because sometimes I can get wrapped up in the “they’ll never get to see me grow into this” thoughts which are heartbreaking at best. But this is why I say for you, do it for you. 

For myself I’ve written a bit, two blog posts, a book review that is up on my bookstagram, this post here counts because it’s healthy to talk about your feelings positively! I’ve been messing around with my poetry again and my novel which has sat there untouched for a shamefully long time.

I’ve been making art separate from writing. Filling up my sketch book like it’s a dairy (it is) and messing around with all different unfinished pieces on my iPad. Art isn’t therapeutic for me to be fair, it’s stressful and time consuming and half the time I can’t work out why the hell this nose bump isn’t translating correctly. But it’s fantastic to channel feelings into, taking it all from within and throwing it up.

I’ve been reading, though slower to last month, and just taking my time with things. I’ve started posting TikTok’s! This is because I’m just trying to, romanticise if you will, my life and the aspect of being alive. I like appreciating existence, and taking the time to film little things has helped me mentally get back into this idea of actually living.

@xo.taylorlani.xo

take yourself out baby, don’t sit around waiting 🤍#opshopping #adveturing #dateyourself #vlog #documentingmylife #romantizeyourlife #fyp

♬ original sound – taylorlani

TAKING TIME

I won’t ever recommend just ignoring your grief, pushing it back or trying to forget. I find it does more harm than any kind of good and, personally, I like to know I still have the ability to feel those things and bring his memory alive. Taking time, taking things slowly or whatever pace is best for you and still having those moments to breathe. I fear the forgetting that comes naturally with time, so this is a really big part of February for me. 

I became obsessed with the moon and the stars because of him all those years ago, which is something really cute when you think of how I practice witchcraft and study those things now. I usually will find time to sit with them and remember, I find this an important part of this month. It’s recognising another year gone and it’s sitting with it. The weight, the tears, the love, the shaking laughter as I recall all our memories and how I live parts of my life with their influence daily. 

Grief is an ugly, unforgivable thing that you never really lose. When I was younger I hated that but now I welcome it, I welcome knowing his story will live through me and I feel these things because he lived. It takes time to get here, it takes time to get through the month of February annually but I’m okay with that.

Pleased To Meet You, Stranger, Welcome To The Ending – Music I Loved In January

February 13, 2022 — Leave a comment

Hey, hey!!

I hope you hadn’t thought I was skipping the music content this year because no way was that going to happen. I’ve had a really nice Christmas and January break and there was no shortage of music around for me. So here is my incomplete – because I can’t put it all here obviously you’ll be here forever – list of music I loved in January.

BETWEEN YOU & ME

The thing about being Australian is that I’m always on the hunt for music I like in this country to build up a catalog of it. It just makes me sad how central to the US and UK everything is music wise.

So back to the point! Between You & Me is a pop-punk style band from Melbourne here in Australia. They’re vibrant and charismatic with a rich blend of pop-punk essence and something so purely Aussie. Their music has this influential charm to it that you get obsessed with, gleaming something golden.

Ever since their last record, Armageddon, released at the end of 2021 I’ve had them on a repeating cycle playing around my life. Again, I’ve been on uni break and Between You & Me probably take the cake for the most played artist during this time.

SOFTHEART

Changing up the pace for this artist, Softheart is indescribable to me. I feel weird strictly saying “rapper” whether or not that’s fronted with terms of identification such as “emo” or “Soundcloud”. Softheart is an artist, he just makes phenomenal art. Really, I could sit here and describe the melodic delicacy of tracks like “110’” but it wouldn’t even relate to the raw chaotic depth of something like “manic”. 

Beautifully complicated in its entirety, and I always find a feeling, a time or a moment where Softheart’s artistry is included in my daily soundtrack.

TAYLOR SWIFT

I don’t think I need to explain this one at all. Though maybe some of you want me to justify why Swift is here in some weird anti-pop mainstream feminine culture misogyny type of way. I get that a lot when I mentioned she’s usually a top played artist for me, paired with the “I thought you liked real music” bullshit that leaves peoples mouths. 

Music is art, life is art, I don’t plan to ever live my life being exclusive of forms of creativity by some shitty boxes in identity structured by society. I don’t care what genre it is, what you fall into. Make art, express yourself and just enjoy these aspects of the world around you for once.

5 SECONDS OF SUMMER

I love 5sos, really with my whole heart I do. I have been one of those insanely younger dedicated Aussie fans since those boys were literal children. It surprises me sometimes how old I am, how much we’ve aged since they started making music and I found it through the holes of the internet.

I love it though, how I in my twenties still on the regular pick up a 5sos record and play it when the first time I did so I was barely a teenager. They’re on this list because I love them, they’re on this list because they’re music grew with me and is aligned with many different eras of myself. CALM is quite perfectly one of the best records I’ve ever heard which is a bold statement sure but I mean it.

POPTROPICASLUTZ!

Recently signed to Epitaph Records, Poptropicaslutz! are a duo who really have just created something special. I hate being closed off to the walls of a genre and I adore artists who tear it down with hammers. But this does leave me here like “how the hell am I supposed to put this into words?!” Really, I can’t so you’re gonna have to take my word for it that they’re truly magic. If I had to really pinpoint some type of idea I could only mumble something like punky-hyper-pop-hip-hop. Which um, yeah, just take my word and listen to them cause that doesn’t even explain it. 

Their discography isn’t large but it’s impressive, energetic and exhilarating. There is no doubt in my mind that this is pure artistry and it’s going to go far. I had everything on a nice little rotation of repeat in January and still now in February. I am, for lack of a better word, obsessed in the best way.

NOTABLE SONG MENTIONS:

And here, to finish off this post are some songs on their own which I’ve had on repeat.

  • Bible Black – Scarlxrd 
  • If You Say So – The Dead Love 
  • Kids Like Us – Magnolia Park
  • The Medic – Foxing 
  • This Must Be My Exit – Oso Oso 

January was inherently fantastic for me musically, and so far February has been just as great that I’m so restlessly excited for what this year with offer or bring me!

So Tell Me Where Do You Go When The Hope Runs Out For A Little While – The Maine “XOXO: From Love & Anxiety In Real Time” Album Review

July 9, 2021 — 1 Comment

Today, Friday the 9th of July 2021, the power pop/pop punk band, The Maine, released their latest album in their already extensive discography titled “XOXO: From Love & Anxiety in Real Time”. The album consists of ten tracks, four of which were singles, paired with bright colours and solid block shapes which really come through when you listen to it. 

Now, personally, I adore The Maine even though the more power pop/neon side of pop punk isn’t exactly my kind of thing. Yeah, yeah you can attack me for not liking All Time Low much here if you want. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with it, or that I don’t like it, I just favour it a lot less than other styles within the genre. That being said, The Maine is one of my favourite bands. They’re just so authentically themselves with their artistry and I’m pleased to say XOXO was no different.

TRACK BY TRACK

Sticky (single, heard before today) – I’m not sure if this was the first single the band released beforehand, to be honest I don’t remember the order they were released in at all. However, I have been listening to them for a long time, and Sticky is by far my favourite from the four singles. It’s catchy and upbeat, really set the tone for the album even though I think it really stands out on it’s own compared to the rest of the songs. I don’t have a lot to say, not because it isn’t one of my favourites but because I do not remember my first reaction at all.

Lips (single, heard before today) – When I first heard Lips just as a single I love, love, loved it. That hasn’t changed at all, but when listening to the album as a collective piece I found I paid attention to it the least. Maybe that’s because everything else following was so new and I’ll be so interested to see how my opinion grows.

Love In Real Time – I took notes as I heard the album for the first time and in them I have written “omg, the fade in was immaculate, the vibe, the flow, the length.” Something XOXO does so well is the transitions and fade outs and Love In Real Time is the first moment I was like OH MY, because really it was lovely. The length is under 2 minutes, however it matches the song perfectly.

High Forever – The transition into this was also notable, as well as the difference that kind of sent me back to other power pop type vibes, that sets it apart from the songs before. Lyrically, there was something to be said about all the repetition, along with the constant empthis of falling in contrast to being high.

April 7th (single, heard before today) – Personally, this was not a song I loved. I like it a lot, I understand it’s place and I wouldn’t take it away at all. April 7th I think is just a song I can’t connect with at this point, but it’s lovey tone makes me want to someday. I will say the change from High Forever to April 7th was somewhat jarring of a difference, though that could exactly be the point. I would have loved a longer fade out, but maybe that’s me being picky.

If Your Light Goes Out – From notes: “oo it’s pretty, the drums are nice, oh wait is that an acoustic guitar??? Oh damn the acoustic, bass and production combo!!” If Your Light Goes Out is notably one of my favourites from this album. It’s a really hopeful song which fits it’s delicate pretty tone so nicely. I loved the way the song fades off to just the acoustic. 

Pretender (single, heard before today) – In this we’re back with the delicate, fairy like tonality, something I find very fitting for their brand and the band. It kinda contrasts the lyrical context, I really like the content, kinda has that authentic og era of pop punk this band came from, along with being really catchy.

Dirty, Pretty, Beautiful – The opening, I like the voicemail type. The vocals are super cool, the harmonies add so much, the textured layering is stunning, like there’s a lot going on but also not at the same time. It does follow a similar format as the other songs, the fairy-ness of their production which makes sense if you listen to it ahhh. The fuzzy at the end reminds me of something by Waterparks actually. I think this was also a notable favourite.

Anxiety In Real Time – The transition was nice here too, the vocals are a forefront aspect compared to some of the other songs. In my notes I wrote that it reminds me of the 1975 somewhat, but still The Maine. Lyrically its relatable as someone with an anxiety diagnosis, though it is broad. The tone of the guitar is a nice change from the others. It feels very long, but I think that’s kind of a point and the static was great.

Face Towards The Sun – This, this is probably one of my tops from this whole album. The intro, again, was stunning and then suddenly oh the drums! “So upbeat damn, very pop punk esc.” This really feels like summer to me, where the rest of the album, to me, encapsulates spring. It feels like spring fading into summer finally as this is the last track. I again made another note on the drums apparently. Hopeful again which is nice to leave off with. Reminds me of the beach at sunset in a true moment of happiness. The soft fade out for the ending of the album is nice. 

MY THOUGHTS

XOXO: From Love & Anxiety in Real Time as a whole is just spring to me. The format flowed through the whole thing with small moments of “ohh that change’, so it is very cohesive. It feels like something you would listen to all at once and together like it was actually written to be a piece of art rather than some songs put together in one place. I think opening with Sticky was great because I had been listening to it for months already and so the album felt knowable. However, I don’t think another single (Lips) should have been track two. It kind of made me want it to hurry up, also I think Lips would fit somewhere else, maybe between Anxiety In Real Time and Face Towards The Sun. That was the only song that felt misplaced to me. The colour scheme was very fitting. The Maine has always been a warm toned band but never I would say as bright, and for some of the production you could say the same. I’m not that knowledgeable about producing so I really can’t critique it that well, but I loved the layering that just overlayed everything. The Maine is one of those neon/power pop era bands that truly is not doing it like anyone else and have always been “them” compared to a lot of others in that style of this genre. The Album really goes to show that too, I would never mistake them for All Time Low, Boys Like Girls, or State Champs. I love that they never fell under that intense wave and era of “Sad Boi, Tumblr” pop punk and started to become another The Story so Far or Neck Deep as many other bands did.

Honestly, it is a lovely album, by a band I love, even if I don’t favour this style/branch of pop punk as much. I really think I’ll listen to this so much in spring and summer. It just makes me want to drive on the coastline with the windows rolled down and the wind in my hair. It feels yellow and orange and red.

Overall, XOXO would be an 8/10 for me. The two points off just because this isn’t my go to style, for myself personally, and more exciting textures and intense ups and downs are something I look for in music. Don’t take that as me saying the flow or the cohesiveness is bad at all because I did like it!! A lot!! Just not a personal preference. 8/10 is not at all a bad rating for me either, in fact that’s still incredibly high. I enjoyed this album a lot, it was exactly what I pictured in a good way, and it makes me feel warm and comfortable 🙂